3 steps to Changing Habits
April 4, 2014
Imagine we are in your living room…
You and I are sitting on the couch and we are talking about how to get your health on track. This is a serious conversation that will set the foundation of every decision you will make for the rest of your life. This conversation between you and I will give you unlimited ability to control your own destiny.
This is a three step process I have learned, adopted, and executed in my life that has allowed me to unlock so much of the opportunity I desire. and today I wanted to share in with you so you could use it too!
Step 1 – Your Ultimate Decision – Dedicated or Interested?
A decision is a definitive moment in time when you tell yourself what your future situation will consist of. A decision can be made right this instant about anything you want in your life, seriously! You have the ability to change your life in the blink of an eye. You may not believe this given your conditioning about slow change. You also may have gone wrong in the past by mistaking intent for decision. I want to make it clear that be interested and dedicated are two completely different things.
Was it your merely intention to lose weight? Did you say to yourself, “I would like to lose 10 lbs.”? This type of statement is called interest.
Or did you say, “I have already lost 10 lbs?” Knowing that you haven’t physically but that mentally your future is already set.
Making a decision has to happen right then and there. The word decision actually means “act today” according to Latin translations.
Do not underestimate the power of of a decision. It is an important word because “decide” can sometimes get mistaken for the meaning of “intent”. Always know that thinking intentions are decisions can be the worst mistake you can make.
Intentions are only interests and are polar opposites of concrete, life-changing decisions. If you are interested you merely have intentions, intentions rarely translate to positive and lasting results.
You can make decision right this minute! For example, I am a personal trainer who truly wants to succeed by helping others succeed. Here is a decision I am going to make right this minute…
“I am going to help one million moms make a decision to change their lives.”
Will I help one million moms by tomorrow? No.
Will I magically help one million moms with luck and hope? No.
But what just happened is that I set a concrete future for myself. When making decisions everything doesn’t have to happen today, but now that I have made my decision all of the actions that I will take from here forward will be a reflection of what I already decided would become a reality.
Each time you win a battle with changing habits that align with your decisions you will have supported your ultimate decision. The more support or references that support you will notice your life changing little by little.
What does this mean for you?
That you have the power within you to make decisions right now about what your future life will be.
Do you want to lose weight?
Get a promotion?
Get along better with your spouse?
Once you have made a decision, there is nothing else to do! Now you just have to wait and execute the things on a successful battles on a regualr basis that will allow you to make your decision a reality.
Eat healthy on a daily basis.
Work harder and do more at work.
Tell your spouse you love them everyday.
If you do not subconsciously execute things that align with your decision then you really didn’t make a decision at all and are merely interested.
Use the following step when you need to change bad habits that do not align with your ultimate goal.
Step 2 – Changing Your Habits Once and For All
I read a lot of books and one of my favorite authors and motivational speakers is Anthony Robbins. This pleasure and pain segment is inspired from his book, “Awaken the Giant Within” which is wildly popular.
Any situation that you can experience in life breaks down into two categories: pleasure and pain. Understanding this and the concept that all experiences are neurologically linked to pleasure or pain is step 2.
We have built up years of experiences or references that we link to either pleasure or pain. We believe cleaning our plate makes us happy. Or does it just make you fat, which makes you unhappy?
Pleasure- “I love it when my husband kisses me.” Is an experience that you link with happiness.
Pain- “It makes me sad when I see an animal dead in the road.” Is an experience you link to pain.
How can you possibly replace the pain of using your will power with a different situation that brings you happiness?
So first you have to decide what you want out of your life, what is your ultimate decision? Make a decision.
Then I want you to try this exercise…
Step 3. Identify and Destroy
Get out some scrap paper. Divide the sheet into two columns by drawing a line right down the middle. Write down 5 bad habits on one side. On the other, write down 5 things that you do that make you happy.
I want you to put a “check mark” next to the habits that do not pertain to your decision at hand. And a big “X” to those that do.
Let’s just say one of the “X” on your sheet was that “your diet is bad because you over eat.”
On the other side of the paper one of the five things you wrote is that music makes you happy.
Now you have to retrain your brain by stopping yourself before you over eat and play your favorite song! Doing this one or two dozen times will train your brain to associate pushing your plate away with food on it as something that makes you happy!
Do you get it??
BUT. It sucks because we link pleasure to over eating and pain to throwing away food. How are we ever going to be pleased by pushing away a big plate of tasty food?
This single step is all you are going to need to change your life forever…
Are you ready?
Retrain your brain to associate pleasure by identifying a bad habit, and destroying your pain of not doing it by doing something you love to do instead! By placing your favorite song that makes you happy in place of over eating you are retraining your brain to associate pleasure with pushing your plate away.
Pharell – “Happy” always puts me in a good mood! Next time you go to over eat or have something you shouldn’t , play that song and push that plate away!
I hope this makes great sense to you! And thank you if you got this far 🙂